I still can’t quite believe that I am the parent of a 21 year old daughter. It doesn’t seem like five minutes ago that I was talking about her turning 18 and wondering what to get her for her birthday, and now we have just passed the 21st birthday milestone. I honestly didn’t know what to expect would happen when my first born went from child to adult and then became independent, moving out into the big wide world. I don’t think anything can prepare you for it as a parent, and for us it wasn’t a transition that I particularly thought about happening, it was just almost there all of a sudden.
I think it helps knowing that I have Miss A at home, still in single digits, as it means the house isn’t totally empty and whilst we may not have any more space than when my eldest was still living at home, I have learned not to lay awake at night waiting for the key in the door before I could go to sleep knowing she was home safe. I have to leave those thoughts alone now as she has her own front door to open.
When my daughter first moved out of home, she was staying with her boyfriend’s family, but they have since got their own place to live now. I remember trying to find a place to live when I moved out of home for the first time and it wasn’t that easy years ago. I know that it has only become more difficult as the years have gone past. Trying to find a nice place to live that you can afford isn’t the easiest job in the world and it can be more challenging if you throw a bad credit rating into the mix. Thankfully eldest daughter has managed to scrape through her latter teenage years without getting a bad credit rating and hasn’t had to try to get a loan with bad credit, but finding the deposit for her first flat was a challenge for her, one I know she was proud to achieve, as was I.
It’s still a strange sensation going to visit her in her own home, and when she comes to visit us, we have to constantly remind her that this is still her home as well. It’s like my visiting my Mum’s house, I don’t help myself to anything and wait to be offered which is strange as it’s the house I grew up in through my childhood.
I really don’t feel old enough to have an adult as a daughter, and I’m not sure I want Miss A to grow up and leave home at all.
Disclosure – this is a collaborative post